1. I am going down to the docks to get my “stuff”. I don’t know what gives me the “warm fuzzies” more, knowing that my books will be neatly arranged on the shelves (alphabetically, by author of course) or knowing that all my shoes are tucked away in the wardrobe.
2. Five (yes count them, FIVE!!) comments - cool huh?
3. After two days of picking at it, that sharp/pointy/stabs at you like a splinter hair has been successfully plucked (take that you bastid!).
Wearing an official Aussie rugby shirt while watching the game didn’t help – maybe I should have rooted a bit harder for the boys [double entendre’ intended].
Mungo’s best friend and former roommate should consider a career in diplomacy. He had the tact to avoid mentioning the fact that my hair resembled something out of the “Hair Don’ts” section of Cosmo magazine and let me discover the shocking truth on my own, thankfully after I had my morning coffee.
Five straight days of rain has done nothing to enhance my recent weepy/cranky mood. I shall take Douglas Adams’ advice and refer to said foul weather henceforth as “Stanley” [apologizing in advance to Stanley the dog who has no influence on the weather at all, and is only named Stanley because he was found on Stanley Street. Thank goodness he wasn’t found on Elizabeth Street, but I digress].
If an award were to be given for “most loveable despite the flatulence” husband, Mungo would win hands down [ he’s a bit whiffy, but he has a heart of gold]. And he buys neat prizes for me. Not only did I get a nifty new communications gadget, but also some yummy chocolate covered ginger to stuff my face with.
Once the “tool creep” issue has been resolved, photos of the latest home project will be forthcoming.
Suggestions for the new blog name are dribbling in at a embarrassingly slow rate. Perhaps I should up the ante a bit? Two packets of timtams and perhaps a flake noir?
Here’s an idea that seems to have some merit, but only if you work in a smallish company where you can put this in action behind the scenes.
WARNING! All human resource personnel stop reading this immediately! Go away and come back next week.
Everyone has heard of the good old “TGIF”. Well, why not make Fridays a bit more fun. Make Fridays in your place of business “ fuck you Friday”. There are a few rules that should be followed:
1. Most importantly and the only rule that, if not followed, will ruin the concept – it is ALL in fun and with tongue FIRMLY in cheek, and it can go too far very quickly if it isn’t done in that spirit.
2. Everyone is greeted with a “fuck you”. This includes everyone from the CEO to the mailroom boy and the correct response is a smiling “fuck you too”
3. You are only allowed to give the “fuck you” greeting on initial contact.. (This means if you see John/Jane Doe fifty times a day you can only say fuck you to him/her once.)
4. You are not allowed to take personal offense at the “fuck you” greeting.
5. A designated “fuck you” area is the optimum way to put this plan into effect, preferably somewhere away from the general public. All “fuck you” communication should be limited to the designated “fuck you” area.
In practice, the “Fuck You” Friday seems to give personnel an opportunity to make veiled (good natured of course) strings of invective and abuse at their colleagues by such inventive variants on the concept as:
Ø A gracious smile and the innocent question “is it Friday yet?”
Ø A wistful sigh and the comment “I wish every day were Friday”
because not only did I drive Mungo to the train station this morning, I also drove to the grocery store and the post office. (Thanks to all who sent words of encouragement).
Now if I could only parallel park.
Contrary to what you may think, bikini underwear worn under a tight skirt is not a good look.
Vote on this now: Body fat calipers should be used before wearing hip hugger jeans and a tight shirt that ends three inches above your belly button.
c. If I see one more set of love handles hanging over the above mentioned jeans I'm going to slap someone.
New blog name suggestion: esmerelda in residence (pro tem)
subtitled "fer fucks sake!"
I had been suffering a bit of angst at my inability/cowardice/lack of chutzpah when it comes to driving here. I am by no means unwilling to take risks, however the task of driving in a mirror image country seemed just a bit too daunting.
I finally took the plunge on Sunday and managed to complete a 10k drive on the roadways without mishap. I did get to wave at the oh so friendly motorist honking his horn behind me when I failed to immediately put the pedal to the metal as the light changed (ok, so I only used one finger..it still counts as a greeting).
Should I send this (insert appropriate derogatory description here) guy a thank you card for helping restore my self esteem?
Currently the name of this blog is "esmerelda in transit" Based on the fact that I now have one of these, perhaps it should be changed to "esmerelda in situ"? Or "esmerelda unaltered"? How about "esmerelda unedited"? (I kind of like that one).
All suggestions will be carefully considered. Prizes may be awarded if I really like your suggestion. (And no dearest, we are not going to rename this to "esmerelda finally gets off her arse and finds gainful employement")
Our faithful retainer Bob, (actually an engine on wheels) is being retired. (Are we the only ones that name our vehicles?)
Bob is going to be replaced by one of these.
I think we'll name her Kate, although Mungo is already referring to it as Der Uber Ute.
(It has cruise control and shiny roll bars n stuff)